I may have to get used to getting aches on every part of my body after every weekend.

… because Didier has a biting fetish. 

Sorry for the lack of updates! 

Lately I’ve been feeling rather lazy to do anything, I’m not even done with anything I’m supposed to do for school, which is the scary bit. However I can’t even pull myself to do anything for them! It’s just the start of the term & I’m already dreading the next 2 years of my contract, & I made up my mind that I do not want to be a teacher, especially if it involves more babysitting & less teaching. I want to do something fulfilling without having people telling me to do what they want & screaming at children who only want to be loved & listened to. Definitely looking for avenues where I can put myself to at least 90%, if not 100% good use. 

Also been busy because of a new found love interest… well can’t say love, we’re dating aye, we’ve done almost everything together & we want to do everything else still, & it’s only been our 5th day together, although he insists it was the 6th because he wants to be all romantic to remember the 1st day we met at the Scottish bar (didn’t count to me, it wasn’t a date!). He’s French Canadian of 27 in July from Montreal, an Aerospace software engineer working on a year long contract with the air force here. 

Whatever it is, we’re psyched about each other & doing everything together, & it’s not just the intimate bits. Not that we had done the deed or anything, I’m still determined to stay a virgin till my husband comes along. We find that we like & don’t like similar things, & we’re compromising, & even challenging each other in the most fun ways. So far we’re planning to travel, rollerblade, swim, sail, & all the adventurous activities. He’s a curious person that is not afraid to ask & learn, possesses self confidence with a touch of gentle demeanor (which guy wears pink & go, “I look great in it, that’s why!”? He does!), remembers every detail of me, is considerate & understanding (he doesn’t drink around me & doesn’t mind that I’m of an entirely different culture), & he’s the only person I know who is Simple Plan crazy as I am, especially since he comes from the same town as Simple Plan! 

I know I pretty much like him loads, the sudden tears that fell when I read the email from him saying that he might have to go to the US next week because of an emergency told me as much. Heck, this is the reason why I don’t admit to myself that I love him, because if I do, I’m as good as fucking myself over when he leaves.
I’m sick of long distance relationships, it fucked me a good 4 years in the last one, which left me pretty sore because my ex turned out to be a selfish coward. & I kept telling myself it was okay, until I saw it with my own eyes when I travelled to break up with him. 
However with Didier, it came to a point where I even forget that I had an ex, we’re just so comfortable with each other.

We’re just uncomfortable when thinking about the future, & as much as it’s obvious that we want this to go on… the inevitable separation stops us from saying the one thing we want. Ugghhh I hate how I’m always chucked in with non-local guys. Granted that I can never get along with a local guy like I do with people everywhere else because of my own background, but to go through separation every single time because I’m seeing someone from the other side of the world & having to start all over again is a total heart breaker. 

One thing I can’t forget was when we lay in the dark yesterday & he just looked at me with his loving eyes & whispered in French. I couldn’t understand most of it, but the way he said all of it, it was clear that he was describing why he liked me…. which he confirmed after he was done. He’s just so sweet. 

& one good thing about expressing it online?
Didier doesn’t read this, because he has no interest whatsoever in Social Media, even though he’s an aerospace software engineer. We discussed this over the morning paper in bed while eating breakfast… a sight that I never thought will happen with anyone.